Saturday 20 April 2013

I Feel (Un)Pretty

Till the time I was 17, I believed that I was ugly with all my heart.
I had braces till I was 17. My hair was a mess that I didn't want to look at. I had glasses. I was (still am) super skinny. So, basically, I was a super nerd and super ugly. I felt like Betty in Ugly Betty. Except that I though Betty had scope for improvement and I didn't.

Some days, I still can't believe that some people think of me as pretty. My glasses are gone (I wear lenses), my braces got removed, my hair's manageable now (all thanks to Habib's hair saloon). But I've been thinking that I was ugly for so long that it's hard for me to think of myself any other way.

Some days I wake up and don't want to look in the mirror for the fear of what I would see in it. When I'm relaxing at home, the hair becomes a mess, the glasses come back and I feel like I'm 17 again (which is not a very happy thing for me).

But then, there are days when 2 out of 5 people I meet compliment me on something or the other. And I realized that looks aren't such a big deal. I know some really people who are really pretty. But this doesn't ensure that they're good people too. And then, sometimes, it's too much of an effort to look good, so I don't really care if people think of me as pretty or zombie. 

I think all I really need is for people to know that I can be pretty when I try. But more importantly, I'm a good person, regardless of my looks.